


Best Laid Plans

by Grumpy Gamers and Vibrant Colors (CantolopeJeevas)



Category: Game Grumps, Ninja Sex Party - Fandom
Genre: Dimension Travel, Fluff, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-30
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-27 15:06:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7623406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CantolopeJeevas/pseuds/Grumpy%20Gamers%20and%20Vibrant%20Colors
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny takes a field trip outside of his zany world in order to seduce another version of himself. Things take another turn, but he still has a pretty good time, all things considered.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Best Laid Plans

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SweetieFiend](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetieFiend/gifts).



Danny had done it. Finally, all of his wildest fantasies would come true. And it was all thanks to the large portal in front of him, spinning with various hues and designs, safely entrapped in metal so it wouldn’t cause untold damage to the multiverse. It would really suck if he had to deal with another SAP situation.

“Ninja Brian!” he called out, eager to show off the portal to his closest (and only) friend.

One puff of smoke later, Ninja Brian was at his side, glaring at him with only a little murderous intent. He must’ve been in a good mood.

“I know what you’re thinking, Brian,” Danny said confidently, despite not having a single clue what went on in Ninja Brian’s head. Some things were better left unknown. “You’re wondering why I built this cross-dimensional teleporter, right? Of course you are.”

As he stepped in front of the control panel attached to the portal, he narrowly avoided a poison dart shot his way. He took no notice of it. “It’s been months since I started my noble quest to find the sexiest person ever, so I can test the limits of my seductive prowess, bone them, and claim the title of-” his voice lowered for emphasis- “Ultimate Lover.”

The keypad lit up under his fingers as he typed in a seemingly random set of numbers. “But you see, there’s no one in the whole universe as sexy as me. That’s why I’m going to go to _another_ universe…”

A screen lit up, showing what appeared to be Danny’s scruffier, less flamboyantly dressed doppelganger. Same eyes, same face, same hair. Practically a carbon copy.

“And fuck myself,” Danny finished, a broad grin on his face.

The cold, hateful gaze of Ninja Brian’s did nothing to dampen his mood.

“It’s the perfect plan, Brian! No one can resist my charm, not even me.” He moved in closer to the portal, heart thumping with excitement as he felt the pull of the other dimension. “I just need you to stay here and keep guard of the portal while I’m gone. Watch the screen carefully. It’ll be up to you to push that big red button when I’m done. Got it?”

Ninja Brian only flipped him off in response.

“Awesome!”

Without further consideration for the possibly terrible situation he was getting himself into, he dived headfirst into the portal. The brief moment in there felt like an eternity. He could feel all the different universes at his fingertips, waiting for the heroic Danny Sexbang to enrich them with his erotic awesomeness. One day, he silently promised. At that moment he had more important things to do.

Much to his dismay, he landed in a crumpled heap on the carpet. Well, that could have been better. At least he wouldn’t bruise.

Danny jumped up in a flash, brushing off his spandex with a charming smile on his face. “Sorry about that. Cross dimensional travel can be very…” He  stopped and finally took in the room. A comfortable couch, a decent TV. But no Dan, as he was known by. “Oh. No one’s here. Great.”

Well, at least he had some time to adequately prepare for the big moment. And boy, did he have some ideas. Surely Dan wouldn’t mind if Danny rummaged through the house for what he needed, right?

Right.

After everything was set in place, Danny made his way to the bedroom to wait patiently. Flower petals were scattered across the apartment, leading from the front door all the way to Dan’s bedroom. The soft, sensual glow of candlelight alongside the smooth jazz finely crafted the mood just to Danny’s taste. And since Danny liked it, Dan would too. There was no way he wouldn’t.

From his position sprawled out on the bed, Danny heard the creak of the front door.  Dan’s muffled voice echoed down the hall. “What the…?”

Footsteps came closer and closer as Danny held his breath. Then Dan stepped into the door frame and he just… Froze. Because it was strange seeing him in person. Right there, without a barrier between them, it became real to Danny that this version of him, his very own counterpart, was someone else entirely. They looked the same, sure, but he could feel that something was different.

They stared each other down for a long moment. Before Dan had the chance to say anything, Danny stood up and sauntered over to him in one smooth motion. There was barely any space between them, but he didn’t back away at all. Good.

With one hand braced against the frame, Danny began his long-prepared introduction, “Hello, Dan. You probably have a lot of questions. I’m Danny Sexbang, and I hail from another world where I dominate the globe with acts of awesomeness and sexual appeal. I’ve killed dragons, fought time travellers, and banged everyone from New Jersey to outer space.”

Dan tried to get a word in. “You-”

“I know you’re in awe, but let me finish,” Danny interrupted, holding a finger up to shush him. “Out of everyone in all the universes, _you_ have been selected to spend a sex-filled night with yours truly.” He leaned in closer, just a hair’s breadth away from Dan. “So, what do you say?”

“Uh…” One, two, three steps and Dan was flat against the wall. With a nervous laugh he said, “This isn’t happening. I’m dreaming. There’s no way this is real.”

That certainly put a little damper on Danny’s plan. “Um, excuse me?”

“Okay,” Dan said. His hands shook, betraying the confidence in his voice. “Okay, look. I don’t know what the fuck is going on. But we’ve got some serious talking to do.”

“I guess we do,” Danny mumbled, not even trying to hide his disappointment. Sure, Dan probably wanted answers, but those could wait until after he was taken to pound town. “Think the talk could wait?” he asked.

“No.”

“Well, okay then.”

While Dan went to the kitchen to _gather his thoughts_ and make some tea, Danny plopped down on the living room couch and contemplated signalling Ninja Brian to pull him back. If he bailed, then no harm no foul. Dan would probably just move on and Danny would be able to find some other version of himself to have sex with.

But Dan’s words still rang in his mind. _There’s no way this is real._ What a weird thing so say. And he’d know, he heard plenty of crazy shit in his life. Sex is bad, you can’t wear skin-tight spandex at an elementary school, that isn’t how you spell nomenclature.

“Hope you like yours the way I like mine,” Dan said as he entered, a mug in each hand. “Figured you would, given that you’re me and all.”

Danny took the one offered to him and gave it a test sip. Minty, and a little sweet. But not too sweet. “Mind explaining what that freaking out thing was?” he asked, turning his head to make direct eye contact.

“Right,” Dan mumbled, as if he had forgotten what they were supposed to be talking about. He stared at Danny for a long second, eyebrows furrowed together like he was trying to solve a puzzle.

What did that look mean? Awe? Confusion? Danny had no idea. Hopefully it was something good.

“So,” Dan began again. “Fuck, man, this is weird. Anyway, I just- I never thought I’d see you. Because when Brian and I made NSP we-”

It was Danny’s turn to be confused. “Wait, Ninja Brian?”

“Uh, no. Brian Wecht.”

“Okay… Carry on.”

“Anyway,” Dan continued, “when we made NSP, we never thought that our characters would become _real_.”

“Are you implying,” Danny asked in his rarely used serious tone, “that you and your Brian Wecht made up me and Ninja Brian like we’re just some cartoon characters? And you guys pretend to be us for your version of the band?”

By the look on Dan’s face, one would think that he’d been accused of puppy murder. He took a large gulp of his tea, then nodded just once.

Something in Danny’s mind clicked. “So if you pretend to be me,” he said, a grin slowly spreading on his face, “then that must mean you have the spandex somewhere!”

Dan blinked owlishly at him. “Um, yeah. What about it?”

“Put it on!” Danny ordered. “I want to see how much you look like me.”

“I guess I can do that,” Dan said, a bit more at ease. “Just give me a minute, okay?”

It took way longer than a minute for him to get dressed, but Danny wasn’t going to mention that. Instead, he marvelled at the similarity between the two of them. He stood up, facing Dan so that they were like a mirror image of each other.

“Holy shit,” Danny said, eyes wide with wonder. “This is so fucking rad!”

“Yeah, it is.” Dan put his hands on his hips and grinned smugly, slipping into character like a favorite outfit. “Think this universe can handle two Danny Sexbangs?”

Danny’s heart skipped a bit. There was something he very much wanted to do, an urge deep in his soul that spoke to him. He reached out a hand and offered, “Dance with me?”

That only earned him a weird look. Lips drawn tight, eyes searching for something.

“C’mon,” Danny pleaded, curling his fingers in a beckoning gesture. Then he started to sing, “ _Girl, close your eyes. Let that rhythm get into you._ ”

One painstaking moment later, Dan took his hand and let himself follow Danny’s lead. They moved together in perfect sync, like the push and pull of wind and ocean waves. When Danny hit the chorus Dan joined in, working the harmonies and proving that they did at least share a trait or two.

Even with their commonalities, though. there was something distinct about how Dan moved, how he looked and sounded, that spoke of his independence. He was more languid, exuding calm energy that Danny just wanted to feel more of and find himself surrounded by. It was difficult for Danny to step away when their song and dance number ended. Something in him craved the closeness, loved the feeling of Dan’s warm body pressed against his own.

He probably just needed to get laid.

“Well, I’ll admit,” Dan said with a warm smile, “that was pretty fun.”

“Did you expect any less?” Danny asked, then pointed a thumb at himself. “I’m the world’s most kickass dancer.”

“Uh-huh.” If he didn’t know better, he would’ve thought that Dan was being sarcastic. “I should’ve known. I do know a lot about you. Too much, actually.”

“No such thing as knowing too much of me.” Danny winked. “And the chance to know me better is still on the table.”

There was a brief second where Dan actually considered it, Danny would swear on his dick. But it was too quick, making an escape before he could seize the opportunity.

“I think I’ll pass on that one, buddy. You’ve got to go home anyway. Ninja Brian’s probably sick of waiting for you.”

Danny waved him off. “He can wait a bit longer.”

“I don’t think so,” Dan said with a soft chuckle.

Up and down Danny pleaded with Dan, listing off pros, giving him bullshit health benefits to having sex with him. All of it was taken with a grain of salt, unfortunately. But he got Dan to laugh a couple more times, so it had to count for something. Brownie points, maybe.

Danny finally caved with his hands up in surrender. “Fine, no sex.” That didn’t stop any of his other Dan-involved fantasies. “But how about a kiss?” he asked with a seductive purr. “Just a small one.”

Nothing was said. But then Danny felt Dan’s lips against his, and a thousand words popped into his mind. _Perfect_ , _complete_ , _wonderful_ , just to name a few. Out of all the kisses he’d had, that one took the cake. Even if mint and sugar overshadowed Dan’s natural taste.

“Bye,” Dan said, pulling away and leaving excess room between them. “It was trippy meeting you.”

“Don’t worry, babe.” Danny leaned back against the wall, hoping that he looked badass and nonchalant. “I’ll be sure to trip you up even more next time I see you.”

He left no time for anymore words before giving Ninja Brian the cue to bring him home. But the portal opened up right where Danny was leaning, causing him to fall backward with flailing limbs and an undignified shriek. The last thing he saw of that universe was Dan’s rightfully confused face.

When he collected himself off the cold, hard ground of the teleporter room, he shot Ninja Brian the look of a disappointed father. “Not cool. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some serious jerking off to do.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is a birthday fic for the wonderful, fantastic, ultra-awesome friend that is SweetieFiend.


End file.
